New Millenium Resolutions

Now come on....you didn't really think that I could let a good century pass without saying the now dreaded "M" word at least once did'ya? ;-)

OK, ok...I promise I'll never do it again.

Now that that's out of the way, I'll get down to business with a few of my own resolutions / comments that I sincerely hope you'll take with you into the coming year

Resolution #1

I resolve to do everything within my power to prove to people that compromise with the "greener than thou" crowd will only result in further loss of land, further loss of rights, and the eradication of our sport as we know it.

Some folks just don't get it, though it's as plain as the nose on their face.

Lets do the math here people. Lets say that we start out with 5,000 acres of land - any old chunk of dirt will do. Now lets say that 50% of that land is abandoned by us just because some college senior decided to do a thesis on the "endangered" Blue-Horned Spotted Jackalope. Lo and behold, he found petrified Jacka-droppings from the Mesozoic era. Now without further fanfare, pomp or circumstance, the EPA, BLM, or other alphabet waste organization comes in and declares it potential "endangered" Blue-Horned Spotted Jackalope habitat.

We being the apathetic losers that we've thusfar shown ourselves to be, just play it like we are the Republican Congress, roll over, show our belly to the sky, and cave in AGAIN! After all, it IS "For the Children"™ right?

50% down, 50% to go

Now along comes the Sierra Club demanding that the Govt. protect the "endangered" Blue-Horned Spotted Jackalope habitat from the ravages of human intervention with "Buffer Zones"™

Let's write off another 20% shall we? Because we don't want to be seen as unreasonable or (heaven forbid) "Extremists", and of course it IS "For the Children"™ right?

Now we're down to 30%

So there we are, off-roading in a state of environmental bliss knowing that we've done our part. We've "worked with" the Govt. and the environmental groups to come to an "acceptable compromise" haven't we?

But then, one hiker group or another points out that their "experience with nature" is being disrupted by those "off-roaders". they just can't seem to get a clear path of communication going with the earth goddess because they heard the distant sound of internal combustion faintly off in the distance. So complaints are filed with the BLM / USFS, and environmental impact studies are done to determine whether or not that OHVs should be allowed in the area.

But surely this is "For Future Generations™". There's still plenty to go around...there's enough for all of us right? Keep reading.......

Imagine your shock when the EIS comes back "snake eyes" and your favorite trail (you know, the one that used to be a mining road back in the 1840's) is "suddenly" found to be causing "sedimentation" in a stream that flows it's way into the "Buffer Zone"™.

Does it make ya randy baby?

Gates are erected at the trailhead, and signs posted informing OHV users that this area is now classified as "Limited Use" by the powers that would be, "Pending Further Study."

So now we can use 30% of the land 50% of the time - or less. Effectively that means we're at 15%.

But wait, there's more!

Now that several government groups, in conjunction with "Environmental Groups" like the Sierra Club, the Nature Conservancy and others have joined forces with "Non-Motorized Recreational Interests™", the motion is made to close off the remaining 30 (effectively) 15% of the land because of the negative impact on the "endangered" Blue-Horned Spotted Jackalope, local streams, and associated support systems within the local ecosystem.

Since we chose to sit back and watch rather than fighting with every fiber of our collective being, the area is closed to all vehicular traffic.Because it's 5000 acres in size, it is then declared "Roadless™", you and I have just inherited another wilderness area - one that just happens to border another OHV trail.

And the process then repeats......

Resolution #2

I will endeavor to become part of the solution rather than remaining a part of the problem.

I know that hearing this tends to upset those in heavy boots of denial but......

Tough. Deal with it.

I say this despite the advice of a great man who just recently told me,

"Norm, off-roaders are a fiercely independent bunch. You can't lecture them, you gotta entertain them. If you don't they'll just go away".

Well, maybe that's true. Maybe the shallower amongst the readers of "Being Green" will head for safer climes. Maybe they'll go somewhere where some other writer will tell them,

"It's ok Johnny Offroader, we'll -always- have trails to ride. We'll just learn to -get along- with the oh so righteous and large environmental groups and everything will be ALLLLL-----RIIIIiiiiiggggghhhhhttttt......."

If that's the case, then so be it. Fortunately I have faith in my readership. I think there are more wolves than sheep amongst you, and I believe you're too smart to drink that particular flavor of Kool-Aid (Rev. Jim Jones style). You want to be part of the solution. That's why you keep coming back month after month. Factually based reporting / commentary may be too much for some to stomach, and it makes some victims whine a lot, but not this crowd. You love the sport, and you don't want to see a bunch of unwashed sprout eating control freaks hose up your favorite pastime.

Resolution #3

I will devote at least 5 whole minuets out of every day toward doing something positive to help our sport.

What can 5 minuets do you ask? Well in a short time it will do a lot. Off-Road.com is currently working on the software for you to e-mail ALL your elected federal officials at the touch of a button. In a mere 5 minuets you will be able to make your opinions known on a variety of topics. We'll even help you do it. Form letters, talking points, and items of concern will all be on the plate for you to devour and distribute.

Now there will be NO excuse for any off-roader with internet access not getting involved.

Resolution #4

I Will Vote to preserve my sport

If you can get off yer' duff to fight your way up the Rubicon, you can get off yer' duff to take a leisurely cruise down to the polling place as well.

I don't want to here the lame excuses like "I don't get involved in politics", "My vote doesn't matter", "I was busy", or "Who Cares?".

Anyone with this pathetic 'tude ought to somehow find the energy to read some history. Read about the hundreds of thousands of men and women who gave their lives in some foreign hell hole, just to protect your right to sit at home and make up excuses as to why you can't, won't, are too busy to go vote.

Easier still. Find a widow or widower from said wars, look'em straight in the eyes and tell them their sacrifice meant nothing. I dare you. If you can't bring yourself to vote on issues that matter to you, then just shut up, sit back, hold on and watch it all go straight to hell - you have forefited the "right" to whine when things don't go your way.

For the past couple years, I've done my best to try to make you all aware of the problems we face, the hypocrisy of the Green Elite, and hopefully provided you with a couple of good laughs along the way. Since it's inception, Off-Road.com has become a major force in Off-Road Media, and beginning in January 2000 the proverbial gloves are coming off.

Y2K will have a significant impact on this country, but it won't be the "future primitive" Luddite paradise envisioned by the likes of the Dave Forman Eco-terrorist crowd. Y2K is the turning point - the time in history where people at large will loose faith in the unfulfilled predictions of the doomsayer du jour, and question the supposed environmental "authority" that the Clinton Administration has rammed down our throats. You can see it happening now in Elko Nevada where the locals thumbed their nose at unjust regulations imposed by the USFS/BLM hydra.

Last month I said we're still holdin' out for a hero, and who knows? Maybe that hero is you. Perhaps that's really the answer after all. Be your own hero. Be a hero to yourself, to your family, and to those around you. If you're lookin' for a guy with a big red "S" on his chest, take a peek under your shirt - you may be suprised at what you'll find.

DIRT FIRST!(with thanks to "Locos Mocos")
Norm Lenhart

"It's Not Easy Being Green" - Article Index

Links to so called "Environmental Organizations"

The Sierra Club Homepage - http://www.sierraclub.org
The Southern Utah Wilderness Alliance - http://www.suwa.org/
Earth First! Homepage - http://www.hrc.wmin.ac.uk/campaigns/ef/pubs/aulat.html